Category: Life Happens

Georgia Snow Day

If you live where snowfall is measured in feet and not inches, you’re probably tired of the snow by January. But living in the Deep South, snow is a magical event that only shows up every few years. Mind you, we get flurries and dustings of snow a few times each year. That’s always delightful, but the real magic happens when we get measurable snow. It’s not just the rarity that makes it magical. There’s lots to treasure about a Georgia Snow Day.

Part of the magic is that everything shuts down, well except Waffle House. I live within a few hundred feet of an interstate, so vehicle noise pollution is an unfortunate part of my daily life. All hours of the day, you can hear revving, honking, emergency sirens, and general vehicle noise. On days like today, you might get the occasional ATV or truck testing out the road or an emergency vehicle, but for the most part the roads are empty and it’s amazingly still and silent.

Another piece of the magic happens within the neighborhood. Beyond the quiet of the snow-laden land, you get the muffled sounds of laughter from children young and old. Some are trying southern sledding (where you use anything flat-ish from your house…most often an old packing box or a boogie board). Some are throwing half-made snowballs at anything and everything. Some are building snowmen. As my children are all grown, I didn’t have anyone to play with but made my own snowman (or maybe a gnomeman) and enjoyed a walk around the neighborhood and beyond. I chatted with families on their own walks, made a few snowballs for the “underdog” at one yard, smiled at the footprint evidence of some fun, and cheered on several kids as they made their own snowmen.

Another part of the magic (for me at least), is your pets’ reactions to the snow. My cats both stared out the window this morning and promptly moved to warmer spots in the house to curl up. My dog, Padme, had quite the opposite reaction. She was so excited that she ran out prancing and jumping with delight.

Last, but certainly not least, is the beauty of nature. All the trees and shrubs covered in the fluffy snow look like something out of a fairytale. It’s a rare and enchanting sight to see the glistening frost and stillness, only disturbed by the occasional bird landing on a branch.

By this point, I was cold and wet but fulfilled. 2024 was a rough season, and nothing feels quite right most of the time these days. I needed some of that magic tucked inside a Georgia snow day to be refreshed and reminded of God’s love through the beautiful little things. As I came back towards home, I even got one last little piece of magic…someone built a little snowman next to my driveway for me. 🙂

The Pandemic’s New Normal

It’s kinda jaw-dropping to think back over the past few months. Things that were a year or two ago feel so far away and so foreign that it almost feels like another life–someone else’s life. It’s so odd to look back and see that I called Covid an epidemic in my last post. I was so hopeful for things to be over soon, yet we’ve now gone through two more huge waves with this thing, each one unimaginably larger and worse than the last. Similarly, it’s bizarre to know I last posted while on the cusp of shifting attitudes about life, the virus, and politics. The darkness I was starting to see didn’t scratch the surface of where it all went. As much as I thought I was going to write about life and experiences during the pandemic, I couldn’t bring myself to do so. I didn’t want to be fake and only talk about the positive, and I didn’t want to talk about all the darkness of this world.

I figured I’d be sitting down tonight to write all the details of things that have happened since I last wrote–both with myself and in the world around me. Now that I’m at the computer, that seems pointless and trite. Most everyone I know has experienced the full gamut of emotions and frustrations. Life seems to both be racing forward and leaving us behind as we tend to cling to what “should” be going on right now. In this new normal, milestones and moments aren’t happening as imagined. It feels like nothing will ever be “normal” again. Way too many people seem to be what used to be the fringe–selfish, thoughtless, mean, & heartless. We the people are allowing entertainers (people making money off “clicks” or “views”) to fill us with lies, and we’re ripping ourselves apart. All the while, the majority (I have to hope and believe that is still true) are trying to do the right things and are so saddened by the state of things in our country.

I hope and pray with all of my being that this time I’m writing on the cusp again–on the cusp of renewal, healing, and positivity everywhere. I’ve recently taken a (nearly) month-long break from all social media. It wasn’t to protest anyone or anything. It was to join my church in an annual “fasting” to remove something that tends to be important to me and replace it with some soul-nourishing time. I was all set to join my small group of ladies in fasting (everyone chose whatever they needed fasting from) and in studying the book of Proverbs together. Ironically, the app we were using had you connect with friends via Facebook and my friend request never connected for some reason. I wasn’t going to break my own promise even to “just” go on FB to try and figure it out. I decided to just go it alone.

I enjoy several social media platforms, mainly for the fun and connection with people I can’t see very often (including my college kids). In a time where I see very few people, this was an especially big sacrifice. I knew it would be hard, but I had no idea how hard it would actually be. I walked away on the evening of January 10th and was supposed to return on February 1st. Problem was, I didn’t quite finish the whole book, so I decided I wouldn’t get back on until the reading was done. There have been moments where I’ve wanted to give up. I’ve missed the connections (and the Bernie memes!) and at moments the reading left me frustrated. I’m stubborn though, so I doubled down.

From my reading, I learned to be patient with the repetitiveness of Proverbs. I’ve read the Bible through before, so none of it’s new, which makes it even harder to focus on and not gloss through. Some moments the reading was frustrating (like, did I just read the same chapter twice or are they just copying/pasting phrases all over the place?). Other moments the reading was annoying (like, I don’t need to know about the adulterous woman–that’s not me). But then I settled down. I started pondering a little deeper, like why are we harping on wisdom? (It has to be mentioned 50 or more times in those 31 little chapters.) Desiring wisdom seems like common sense to me, but then I apply that thought to the world around me and see that it clearly isn’t common sense. So I understand it’s harped on because it’s so essential. Even with the adulterous woman, I can see the comparison to so many other things where “persuasiveness can lead you astray”. (I might could write a whole political paper on that one phrase.) I got to the end and loved the “Wife of a Noble Character”. I relate to a few parts of her (not just because she wears purple). I wish I were more like her and it gives me a reminder to strive towards more. My reading reminded me of the importance of humility, grace, kindness, giving, and striving towards wisdom. Bigger than all that, I realized that Jesus’ words were there way back in the Old Testament, spelled out through so many of the sayings in Proverbs–Love your neighbor as yourself. It sounds so simple until you think about how much you love yourself. I move forward working to do better with that simple, yet incredibly difficult, ideal.

As to this crazy world we’re living in right now, I can’t predict what’s next. I hope that people will follow the words of our current President (whether they like him or not) and work towards coming together. Our country can do such great things when we come together. I hope that this virus subsides into something more manageable and less deadly. I hope that we get to see great innovations come out of this historic time period. I hope that our country makes strides towards a place where all are treated equally and anyone wanting to work a full time job can do so–and can live off of that wage. Lofty hopes, I know.

Me personally? I’m so blessed and thankful right now. We’re okay on the big life stuff. I would love to see Alex sing again in person, and I want him to make this summer’s trip to Norway. I would love to see Lizzy play again in person, and I’d like her to get some normal college class interactions. I would love to see Brandon play again in person, and I want to take him on a college tour trip, like I did with the others. I want to be able to go out to a normal dinner with my hubby. I want to go on a trip with my fam, whether it’s the west coast trip we had planned or something else. I want to see all my other family without all the complicated pandemic “feelings”. Most of all, I still want lots of warm hugs.

Love all of you that support my nonsense (and my sanity) by encouraging me to write!

How I came to Know Coronavirus

I don’t remember the exact day I heard the term Coronavirus, but I certainly didn’t know it was soon to be largest phenomena I would witness in my lifetime. I do remember where I heard it…at work one day when I referenced my upcoming cruise with The Angels. The sweetest lady I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing, and the joy of working with, told me I shouldn’t go on that cruise because I could catch Coronavirus. I didn’t know what she was talking about at first because when she’s catching up on the news, I’m busy with all the activities that come to a mom with busy teenagers. Not complaining or nothin’, that’s just where we both are in our lives. So I look up some news, see it’s all about China, and decide it doesn’t matter since I’m not going on a cruise that connects to China.

As the time for my cruise draws closer (set for President’s Day week), I hear a little more hear and there, and I hear the change from “not transmissible human-to-human” to “well, it looks like human transmission is possible”. But it’s still all about China.  So, meh.

Then I start hearing about some cruise ship floating around with infected people.  “Quarantine” and “Isolation” become words discussed in social groups now. Talk is swirling of other countries, other than China, having cases of Coronavirus. My sweet office lady is telling me daily not to go on the cruise. Other people are starting to say,  “Are you still going?”, “Make sure to wash your hands!”, and other panicky things…some in a joking manner and some in a serious manner.

*Side Note – I was also worried about this cruise because I’ve had increasing issues with motion sickness over the past five years. I went prepared with two kinds of motion sickness meds, pressure bands, ginger candy, and lots of hope. I’ve described lots of details about the actual cruise on my social media, so I won’t go into that here.

So fast forward toward the end of my cruise. I try making the most of this last sea-day (the least fave day for someone with motion sickness).  I sleep in a little, read my book and eat a leisurely breakfast while watching the sun tick across the line of the ocean. I go to the tucked away jewel on the top deck at the front of the ship (queue Titanic music here, LOL) where very few people are around, so it’s quiet and tranquil on an otherwise busy ship. I lay with the warm sun on my face and the wind whipping in my hair and I take solace in the sensory overload experience that somehow pushes down the motion sickness feelings temporarily. I go straight to the Lincoln Center meet & greet and stay for a beautiful chamber orchestra performance with a French theme. From there it’s tea time with my Angels, then a trip to the spa (heated stone lounge chairs with a view of the ocean–Heavenly!), then ready for another gala night dinner. After dinner, I dash down to enjoy another Lincoln Center chamber performance–this time Schumann. I’m leaving it a little early to meet the girls for the big evening entertainment, and when I get up I feel slightly weak. (I figure I’ve actually been pretty active this week, so maybe my lazy ass was tired.) As I get to the other end of the ship to meet my friends, I start coughing. (I chalk it up to allergies, as I have so many allergies that I’m used to a cough showing up somewhere on a trip away from home.) I start feeling out of it during the evening entertainment–so much so that I still don’t recall much about the performance; it was a variety act with several of the groups from earlier in the week (a dance troupe and a comedian, I think). We get up to go play group Scattergories, and I feel totally worn out. I sit with the group and play the game, but I feel like I’m in a fog. I head straight to bed feeling chilled and weak. I don’t sleep well as I can’t get warm enough and I can’t stop coughing (on top of the motion sickness being the worse at night). We get up early for the day I looked most forward to — a cabana and snorkeling in the Bahamas — and I feel like I was beat up all night. I try to eat breakfast but I don’t feel like eating and everything seems to make me cough. I tell the group I’m going to lay back down for awhile and then join them. I don’t lay there more than 15 minutes before I realize something is very wrong and I need to go to medical.

Well, medical is a joke. They’re open very limited hours (four hours total that day) and there seems to be one nurse and one doctor, and a waiting room with quite a few people. I tell them I’m certain I have a fever, and I’m coughing into my elbow the whole time. I ask if they have a mask and they say I’ll get one later if I’m deemed to need one. There’s no hand sanitizer at the counter or in the waiting area. There are lots of other things that are done wrong that I’m not going to get bogged down into. The doctor swabs me for the flu, turns around and does something on the counter, and turns back to me and says “You have the flu.”

Mind you, I was in there weak and running, as it turns out, a 103 temperature. I don’t realize until many days later that there’s no way she ran a flu test in that time.

I go through an ordeal for the last 24 hours of my cruise. At this moment, I cannot relive those hours. I know that sounds dramatic but it is what it is. I thought I was going to die on that boat that night. At the time I knew they were doing some of this quarantine stuff poorly. Now I know they were doing all of it wrong, as I’ve learned a lot about quarantines here lately.

By the strength of God, I was able to put on my purse and backpack, and roll a suitcase off that ship. Travel that day and next is a blur. My sweet friends got me through FL and into GA, but they had to stop overnight. Every rest stop and the hotel got me plenty of fearful and/or angry “looks” with my medical mask. I finally got home and I kept everyone (okay, everyone except Thom) at bay but talked a little about my trip. I went to bed early, and then I broke.

I was still fighting a fever and unbelievably weak and felt like I was looking out at life while in a black hole.  I felt the intensity of the ship rocking during a storm, even though my feet had been on land for days. I don’t know if it was the illness or the Tamiflu or the fact that they had given me cough medicine with Guaifenesin as one of the many ingredients (and that I’m allergic to). All I know is that I couldn’t stop rocking my body (trying to counteract the land motion sickness)…I couldn’t stop crying…I couldn’t get the darkness out of my mind and my body.

Despite having a flu shot and despite taking Tamiflu within about 14 hours of symptom onset, I wasn’t fever-free (without the help of meds) until Tuesday, and I started getting sick Thursday. That’s six days of really sick even though having the flu shot is supposed to minimize the duration of the flu (if it doesn’t protect you entirely). That’s six days of misery even with the Tamiflu (which is also supposed to shorten the duration also). It seems like this virus ran its course regardless of the vaccine and antiviral meds.

People started joking with me that I actually had Coronavirus. Then some people seemed serious once they heard how things went down. My roommate from the cruise came down sick two or three days after me, but then she tested negative for the flu. They treated her like it was the flu though, and she had the same weird oppressive depression as me. Well if I had the flu and she got it from me, then she should’ve had a positive flu test. And her timing of illness (and it being the same kind of illness) seems to point very strongly to her getting whatever it was from me. So, of course I’ll never know, but I have to wonder if I actually had Coronavirus. And thus becomes the moment when this thing become close and personal to me.

 

42 Will Do

As I get older, birthdays become less of a spectacle and more like every other day. However, I try to fight that by embracing the day with some fun things that I enjoy but rarely get around to doing. (In all fairness, I sometimes spread the fun out a little because life is busy and I can’t just give myself a whole day of freedom.) I bought a game for myself (Carcassonne—thanks for introducing me to it Cathy), have been milking all those free birthday offers (Chick-fil-a frosted coffee has been the best one), will enjoy some meals and fun with family and friends, and I’ll write. Yes, I know, I write all the time for my job and various volunteer roles…but I mean write for me, for fun.

Since I’m turning 42 today, it only seems appropriate to embrace my geeky love of that number. Yes, I am officially the age of the “Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, The Universe, and Everything” so that must mean I have arrived at something meaningful. Of course, just like in the book, I’m no closer to understanding the Question.

42 is a great number but not because it’s 101010 in binary, and not because light hitting water at 42 degrees causes a rainbow (although that is pretty cool to know). It’s a great number because it’s where I am. I like what Douglas Adams said about the choice of the number 42—“42 will do.” I’m not jealous of the years gone by, nor am I rushing on to the next phase of life. I am content in where I am and will try to embrace each day that I’ve been given.

My sweet hubby commented today that I’ve been his “answer” for decades, and that’s incredibly touching. I try to be an answer (not “the” answer) for many people in many situations…often not knowing their question. If I’m a light in the world or a smile on a face for even just a fraction of the people I encounter, then that delights me more than I can express. God has blessed me with so much; it would be a waste to keep it all to myself.

To all those in my life, from those I see daily to those that I only talk to through social media, thanks for being a part of my life, on my birthday and otherwise. Here’s hoping I have at least another 42 with you!

Heather 1974i

I’ve come a long way!  🙂

I Love My Church

Growing up, my family celebrated Valentine’s Day on a grander scale than just romantic love. The girls gave cards and candy to the boys and vice versa–from grandparents to cousins and everyone in between. It was never anything grand, but just a token of the love we had for one another. I’ve embraced that mentality across the board as I try to celebrate all the different loves I have in life. I love my husband, my children, my family, my friends, and my cats…all in different ways of course. I love time in nature–from a long walk along the ocean to a wandering hike through the forest. Most importantly, I love God for all these things that He’s blessed me with.

One of the loves that I’m particularly thankful for in this season of life is love for my church. Those who know me best know that I don’t say that flippantly. I’ve always felt church is important, but it’s been a long time since I could really say that I love my church. I’ve been on a church journey (teasingly called church shopping by my family) for several years now and been happy with our current spot, but it was really just this past month that I truly felt the love.love my church

In the Beginning

We had a church home that I loved for many years and felt like my children and I spiritually grew up there. But a day came when several programs we were involved in were simultaneously cancelled, seemingly without much consideration of those who were pouring their hearts and time into the programs. Well, like any relationship gone south, it was hard to recover and feel like it was still a church home…so the journey began.

Wandering the Desert

We visited lots of churches and quickly grew tired of the search. So, we settled on a place that seemed like a good possibility for that new home. At first I didn’t get involved (beyond attending) as I was leery of putting my heart and soul in again. Of course, there’s always a push (and need) for volunteers, so I ended up helping make the Lord’s Supper bread each month. (I still think this is one of the coolest things this church did, praying over the bread as we made it and experiencing the Lord’s Supper each week.) However, it wasn’t long before my kids started complaining that while church was fun, they weren’t learning anything. So, I volunteered to work in the kids area to see what was happening. Sure enough, despite the fact that a sheet of paper came home each week explaining what the kids learned, college kids were paid to lead the rooms and did nothing but talk to one another while the kids played. I brought my concern to the director and suggested that we should either stop sending the papers home or start teaching the lessons. No kidding–she informed me that there were lots of other churches around if I didn’t like it there.  And we were back on the church hunt…

After more of the tiring church visits, we ended up at a nearby church where several of our friends had landed from our original church home.  I purposely stayed away from volunteering, but ironically ended up getting a job at the church preschool. That ended up being the longest year of my life. The director, let’s just say, didn’t come across as a good Christian woman and ran that preschool with some fairly despicable (and probably illegal) practices. Most of the preschool workers had stopped attending church there because the director was also in charge of Sunday’s children’s programming. The one person who had the guts to go to the pastor about the situation was then slandered and fired. Needless to say that I quickly moved on from this church.

My Piece of Promised Land

Begrudgingly, we entered the church journey once more. When we arrived at our new church home, I immediately felt like it was our new church family. However, I let my experiences from the past hold me at bay…simply attending each Sunday. However, it wasn’t long before my spirit answered the volunteer call, and we all became involved in the church. I didn’t realize it at the time, but my heart was still guarded–waiting for what might go wrong this time. But in just the last month, events unfolded where I realized my input was actually desired and valued. I suddenly discovered that I was home, where I am part of something and not just a number or a slot in the volunteer schedule. I can’t even describe the joy that tumbled out of me and the release of emotions from years of pent up sadness. Thankfully, I can look back with clarity and see the lessons learned from my journey. Hopefully my children have learned some positive lessons about not settling for mediocrity, about persevering through difficult times, and about answered prayers. While I know my church and its people are far from perfect, I love that they’re constantly seeking to be closer to God. And on top of all that, I’m overjoyed to confidently say that I love my church. I pray that anyone out there on a similar journey can hold on tight and enjoy the ride–and ultimately find the place that God has for you.

A New Year Leads to New Stuff

January is a month of renewal, resolutions, and generally crummy weather. After a month of extreme decorating, fevered shopping, abundant entertaining, and essential family time–our houses and our bodies feel like a tornado went through town. The extremes between the two months and the beginning of a new year lead us to resolutions because it’s the only thing that makes sense to take back control of our lives. With that in mind, let’s look at the positive ways the new year leads to new stuff.

christmas-xmas-gifts-presents

 

 

 I Love It, But Where Will I Put It?

Regardless of which December holiday you celebrate, you most likely received gifts from family and friends. If you have children, you may have more new items than old! While it’s a joy and blessing to receive gifts, January has come and now it’s time to find a place for the new stuff. As you find homes for the new, you inevitably find a lot of cleaning and organizing that needs to be done along the way. Don’t be overwhelmed! All you need is an organized plan of attack. Grab some boxes (or whatever else you can find) and divide items out by which room they go in. Put each box in its appropriate room and then tackle rooms one by one.

 

But Every Room in this House is a Hot Mess!

So, you’re ready to put items away and you discover that there’s no room, it’s unorganized, or the dust is one inch thick. Don’t despair, and don’t give up on your healthy resolutions to just curl up in the fetal position on the sofa with candy! Just take things one room at a time…however long it takes. I’m gonna date myself here and reference the television show, Clean Sweep. Hopefully you won’t need to do this outside on tarps, but the idea is the same–sort all that room’s stuff into keep, trash, and give. Be realistic about what to keep. Those jeans from middle school that are six sizes smaller are only making you feel bad about yourself; and that three-year-old sweater you’ve never worn might actually be appreciated by someone else.

Once you sorted it all out, find a place for your give items (maybe some large boxes in the basement), and throw away the trash. Now clean the room to whatever level you want/need. I don’t have a lot of time for deep cleaning throughout the year, so I do it all at once–dust, clean windows, vacuum hidden crevices, wipe down the walls, touch up paint, and replace light bulbs. If you’re happy with just wiping down the dust and running the vacuum, that’s cool too. Now you’re ready to move the new items in and mark one room as done! Repeat as necessary.

 

Time to Update?

As I go through each room, I often find that something needs repairing or updating. I make note of these items as I clean, but I don’t let it derail me from the task at hand. When I’m done with all the rooms, or just need a change, I’ll fix the things I can and shop for the replacement items needed. (This is when gift cards are the bomb!) You may be thinking it’s ridiculous to even consider shopping when your original problem was having more stuff come into the house. However, a trip to the Container Store can help you improve organization (especially if you have a smaller house with lots of people, like me).

Also, you have to replace torn sheets, lifeless pillows, and grungy towels at some time, and the best time actually is January. White sales have been around forever, well since John Wanamaker created this sales event in 1878. Of course, a lot has changed since then. The original white sale was specifically for white bed linens because business was slow. Today’s white sales include most home goods. While it’s smart for retailers in a month of dreadful sales, it’s also smart for you since some of these things simply need replacing from time to time. (And why not do it when it’s on sale???)

 

So, the new year leads to new stuff–and we can celebrate that. The crummy weather has kept you inside and on track. I hope you come through January with a home that is cleaner and more organized. Good luck on any other resolutions and have an outstanding 2016!

 

(This blog article was originally written for PillowCubes – head on over there if you’d like to freshen up your home with some new pillows!)